When do children begin to understand what they are told? At what age do children start talking?

November 21, 2018
Child psychology
Artem Minasov

All parents look forward to the moment when their children begin to understand what they are being told. Speech proficiency is the most important task that the baby has to solve. To cope with this, you need to begin to perceive individual words, pronounce them and combine them into phrases. And parents are obliged to help their baby. It’s not easy, but the first cherished words “mom” and “dad” will bring so many emotions.

When children start talking: first attempts

It is almost impossible to say exactly when a child begins to understand what is being said to him. All children begin to develop speech and word recognition at different times. Some begin to speak earlier, others much later; in any case, the baby will not do it right away. First, the child will remember sounds and words and try to perceive them. Later the baby will start to walk. After six months of life, the humming will be replaced by babbling. The child will make attempts to pronounce the simplest syllables - “ma”, “ba”, “da”. And he will begin to understand words. These words are very simple, and they do not have a stressed syllable. As a rule, children try to name the most important things and actions.

For example, if a mother constantly names objects to her child, then he will answer the next question: “Where is the door?” – will turn his head in her direction. The baby will also try to joyfully copy adults in their actions: he will try to drink from a cup, and often has fun when he feels that he is understood.

Rule No. 5: When not to say “no”

Parental prohibitions should not contradict the most important needs of the baby, necessary for physical and psycho-emotional development. It is better to remove the words “you cannot run (jump, scream, climb)” from the vocabulary. The following example demonstrates this approach well. One mother is trying to explain to her child why she shouldn’t draw on the walls. The second is that in the place where the little artist likes to draw, he hangs a piece of old wallpaper to develop his creative abilities. Which position is closer to you?

Of course, you can ensure that the child does not paint the walls or stain the furniture with paints and glue. The result is a tidy house and a bored child who doesn’t know what to do. Such children, burdened with prohibitions, often have neurotic reactions: this is how the body compensates for unfulfilled needs for self-development.

Psychologists distinguish two extremes. Some parents copy the patterns of their own upbringing: they do not allow their children to do what they themselves were forbidden to do in childhood. Others go from the opposite. Parents who grew up in strictness try to free the child from any restrictions, giving him real freedom. Both ways are wrong. Try to follow the wise golden mean, leaving prohibitions for a vital range of things.

Adults should be aware of how the abundance of prohibitions affects the child’s psyche. Especially if they themselves do what is prohibited. A one-year-old baby cannot explain to himself the true reason for the restrictions. His thoughts can take two undesirable directions:

Parents are bad. They don’t allow me, but they do it themselves.
If they can do it, but I can’t, that means I’m bad.

In the first case, the child develops resentment or aggressive behavior, which he directs outward: towards peers, animals, toys. This provokes him into involuntary whims and hysterics. In the second option, the child blames himself. He develops low self-esteem, he gets used to being in the role of a loser.

To avoid these unpleasant consequences, it is important not only to correctly explain to the child what “no” is, but also to correctly formulate prohibitions. Leave “not allowed” for critical, dangerous cases; for everything else, the “great and mighty Russian language” will help you.

Many children, through whims and stubbornness, try to show their independence, as well as test the limits of their abilities, the patience of their parents and others. Thus, the child asserts himself and develops self-confidence, dedication, determination and perseverance. However, quite often parents accept this behavior as disobedience.

The baby is trying to say: how to behave?

The first time conscious words are heard from a baby is from 8 to 12 months. This is usually the period when the child begins to understand adults. He tries to turn to mom or dad, and sometimes asks for an item. Parents, as a rule, are incredibly happy, believing that their child is finally starting to speak. However, statistics show that speaking words for a long time does not carry any semantic meaning.

Some additional tips

Many mothers ask when does the baby start talking , when should the baby start talking, when should you start talking to him and when does the baby start talking clearly and distinctly? As was said, the baby pronounces his first words a year, and in the period from 18 to 24 months he begins to pronounce his first short phrases.

To stimulate a baby's speech skills in the right way, the environment plays a fundamental role. But it is also necessary to take into account his own rhythm of development, because it differs from one child to another, and try not to force him to learn words and their pronunciation.

Below are some little tricks that parents and other loved ones can use to help their child develop his communication skills:

Say things to your child while looking directly at him, and avoid other people interrupting your conversation.
The best help comes from not only parents, but also grandparents. The child will be more relaxed only with people he likes. In addition, it will be easier for him to reproduce different tones of voice and intonations of words if the same person is constantly talking to him.
Address him by calling him by name. The concepts of “I”, “you”, “mine” are quite difficult to understand.
Talk to him about objects that are physically present at the moment. In this case, he can see with his own eyes what is being told to him.
Tell him about situations and subjects that interest him.
Try to understand the words he says and encourage him to express himself more clearly and better. Do not correct his mistakes with a pronounced accent, otherwise you risk quickly tiring and even disappointing the child.

At what age does a child begin to understand?

All children are different. You can find many tables that describe what children can do at a given age. However, each child has his own individual parameters. Despite this, parents should definitely study the information on how the child’s age corresponds to his speech development:

1–3 months - the child screams, cries loudly, tries to repeat simple sounds - “a-a”, “a-gu”, “a-wu”.
4–5 months – the baby laughs, squeals, and makes drawn-out sounds with different intonations and emotions.
6 months - the baby recognizes the voices of his parents, tries to babble, makes sounds a little like “ma”, “pa”.
7–8 months – the child perceives words and simple requests (give, take). This is exactly the age when a child begins to understand the word “no” and imitates the bark of a dog or the sounds made by other animals. At 8 months, the baby remembers the names of some objects, but still cannot pronounce them.
9–11 months - the baby learns to speak simple words - “mom”, “dad”, “na”, “give”. His vocabulary contains no more than 10 words.
1–1.5 years – the child knows how to form word combinations, knows what some animals and people look like, and can identify them from illustrations.
2–3 years – children understand and learn to ask questions, know different concepts, carry out simple tasks, make sentences, learn and tell fairy tales and poems.
3–4 years old - the child already talks not only with mom and dad, but also with relatives and sometimes with unfamiliar children.

According to long-term statistics, the first word of most children is “mama” or “dai.”

Rule No. 4: “Patience and work will grind everything down”

You should not think that a one-year-old baby will understand the prohibition right away. Its full comprehension still exceeds the capabilities of a child's mind. Active resistance is not caused by willfulness, but by misunderstanding. The task of education is to try to clearly explain to the child the consequences of violating the prohibition through regular repetition of similar situations.

One-year-old children are perfectly aware of body language, facial expressions and emotions. At this age, mother’s frightened face works much more effectively than explaining that there is a biting beast inside the socket – electricity.

When disobedience does not pose a danger to the baby’s life, give him the opportunity to do his own thing. He will see the result, and the need for repetition will gradually disappear. Many one-year-old children like to drop toys or spill water. Allow them these cute pranks: from each such experience, kids extract valuable information that is difficult to explain in words.

Read also…. Table of height and weight norms for children under 17 years of age by year (WHO)

Limits and rules must be agreed upon within the family. When mom says “you can’t,” dad or grandma shouldn’t say “you can.” Such bifurcation is difficult to comprehend even for an adult, and for a one-year-old baby it is more difficult than Newton’s binomial.

Becoming Conscious Speech

The pronunciation of these words may not be perfect, but it is recognizable. In addition, the baby speaks in certain situations: the word “mom” is pronounced when she enters or leaves the room. If a baby points, for example, at a cat, saying “kitty,” it is important for parents to confirm that it is a cat, and then check with him where it is. If a child points to an animal, it means that he is beginning to understand. Later, the child will be able to answer certain questions not with a simple hum, but with a specific word.

Even if the child does not speak, this is not yet a reason to panic. Most likely, he will quickly catch up with the norm. After a year of life, the baby rapidly fills its vocabulary. Thus, without yet uttering the name of a certain object, he understands what the adult is talking about. The baby begins to fulfill simple requests, for example, he can bring a ball or a toy, and also often resorts to a pointing gesture, which is accompanied by a demanding intonation. This indicates that a stage is gradually approaching when the child begins to understand what is being said to him.

Rule #3: Accompany a ban with a clear action

Psychologists do not recommend reinforcing forbidden words with punishment. Spanking and other discipline will cause confusion and fear. Your job is to explain with words, not physical pressure.

The goal of the action is to remove the baby from the danger zone. Remove the baby smoothly, without jerking or other painful movements. You can grab and hold his hand, move the child away from an object that he is curious about, or distract him with something interesting. Explain the reason for the ban briefly, without unnecessary philosophizing. For example, “you can’t touch the fire, it will be “bo-bo.”

A few more useful tips on how to explain the word “no” to your child.

Test your baby's reactions in a safe environment. This will help ensure that your explanations are correct. Be prepared that a one-year-old child will not learn the lesson right away. It depends on his mental maturity and temperament. Some naughty ones will stubbornly defy parental restrictions.
A child should not feel that adults pay maximum attention to him only when he approaches something forbidden. Take enough time to explain to him not only the bad, but also the good things. Otherwise, he will deliberately attract your attention by doing something he shouldn’t.
At one year of age, babies can do things like pull out mommy's hair and the like. In this way he simply demonstrates his affection. In such a situation, say: “Mom is hurt” in a calm tone and stop it with something positive, for example, a kiss on the hand.
The method of enhancing intonation works well for young children. If your child does not respond to the word “no” said in a quiet voice, repeat it several times in a lower, more demanding tone.

At this age, it is better to distract children than to use the “time out” method. A time-out is when you place your child in a remote location for a few minutes, such as in a playpen. This method usually doesn't work because children this age have no idea what you're trying to achieve and simply don't remember what they did wrong.
Use the "safe home" concept. Remove things from your child's reach that he should not touch. In this case, the number of “cannots” will be reduced, and its effectiveness will increase.
When it is necessary to distract your child or change the situation, be sure to offer an alternative. For example, put away your expensive smartphone and occupy his attention with an educational toy. Playing with the smart bunny is so much fun!

At first, the child, doing something that is forbidden, sees the parent’s reaction, but acts contrary. Gradually he learns to say “no” to himself. Finally, when the lesson is completely learned, he asks: “Can I?” Thus, first he learns the concept of “cannot”, and then “can”. This is confirmed by the fact that one-year-old children are prone to denial. They will most likely answer “no” to any question. The word “yes” appears in children’s vocabulary much later. Don't take children's "don'ts" personally. It does not indicate a lack of recognition of authority, but is a manifestation of independence and a desire to imitate adults.

Causes of delay in the development of the speech apparatus

Soon the long-awaited moment comes when the child begins to understand speech. Parents are obliged to take part in every possible way in the development of the baby’s speech apparatus, adhering to a simple rule: constantly talk to the baby from the first months, and be sure to pronounce the words correctly. Babysitting will most likely slow down the development of the speech apparatus and is quite capable of causing problems with speech in the future. However, all children learn to speak at different speeds. Most often, girls begin to speak earlier than boys.

Often inexperienced parents try to determine at what age the child begins to understand words and try to pronounce them. If a child does not begin to speak at the age of 2.5 years, then there is a need to consult a specialist. However, you should not go to extremes. There is no need to demand too much from the baby; it is necessary to take into account his development and age. At the same time, it is unacceptable to ignore the existing problem, because developmental delays are easier to correct at the initial stage. Speech delays are quite common and can be due to the following reasons:

Heredity. Probably, mom or dad started talking at a late age, and the child inherited this feature.
Problems with hearing or speech apparatus. Most likely, these organs are not developed enough. Only doctors can determine this more precisely.
Neurological disorders caused by hypoxia during childbirth or illness.
There is little or no dialogue with the child.
Active child. He is in a hurry to explore the world, his physical development is higher than his speech.
Tensions between parents. Children subtly perceive the atmosphere in the family, which affects their development.

The sooner the doctor understands the exact cause of delays in speech development, the faster he will help get rid of them. Treatment will help the child quickly catch up and speak correctly. By the time he goes to school, the baby will not be different from other children.

Speech development problems in a baby

Children who have hearing problems stop mumbling around six months. If your son (daughter) has stopped making sounds and does not even try to do so, does not look at you when you talk to him, and does not try to repeat your words, you need to consult a doctor. The earlier hearing problems are identified, the easier it is to offer appropriate treatment to stimulate the development of language skills.

If your son is 15 months old and he has not spoken a single word yet, or you cannot understand a single word spoken by him, then consult your pediatrician as some illness may be the reason behind this. The following situations indicate some problems with hearing and delayed speech development:

when the baby does not mutter and does not point to objects at 12 months, for example, you ask him to point to the dog from the story, but he does not pay attention to you;
when he doesn't say a single word at 16 months;
when he doesn't speak two-word phrases at 24 months;
any cases demonstrating regression of linguistic and social abilities.

If by the age of three a child cannot pronounce all consonant sounds or replaces some sounds with others, then he may have problems with speech or hearing. In this case, consult your pediatrician about the need for any testing. Prevention never hurts, even if the child is fine.

All children stutter or stumble when speaking from time to time. In some cases, they are so happy and excited to tell you something that they cannot pronounce all the words with ease. Let the child finish his sentence and do not interfere or correct him. However, if a child stutters constantly, then it is necessary to consult a speech therapist or other language specialist. It doesn’t matter what age a child is, if he starts to stutter, and within 6-12 months he begins to treat this defect, then treatment proceeds quickly.

Recommendations for parents to help their child start speaking

The time when children begin to understand what they are told depends entirely on the parents and their participation in the child's development. To help your baby begin to pronounce the first phrases, you should follow these recommendations:

If possible, talk to your child as much as possible, talking through all your actions many times. Listening to his parents speak, he replenishes his vocabulary. You can accompany your daily activities with songs, because children easily perceive such text.
To begin with, you should resort to short phrases; the baby will not immediately perceive complex sentences.
The baby's cooing and babbling should be repeated constantly. It is necessary for the child to see the face of the speaker, then he will establish a connection between the source of the sound and the pronunciation.
You cannot lisp, speech must be clear and correct. But when naming objects, you can resort to two names: full and imitative. For example, “cat”, “kitty-kitty”. In this case, the baby will listen to the word that is easier for him to pronounce, and after the required time has passed, he will move on to the correct form.
It is useful to read books to children. Of course, you should choose them by age. Nursery rhymes and simple rhymes will do. A one-year-old baby will be interested in looking at the pictures. Later, you should encourage him to name the objects in the pictures. After one and a half years - encourage students to finish lines in poetry.
You need to pay a lot of attention to fine motor skills. It is closely related to the speech apparatus. Therefore, work with your child: let him sort through the cereal, sculpt and draw with him. All activities that involve hands are suitable; even tearing paper is useful.

By devoting sufficient time to the child, parents will never miss the moment when their miracle utters its first words. And it doesn’t matter how many words a baby says by the age of 1.5 years. The main thing is to take an active part in his development and constantly talk to him.

How to teach a child to understand the word impossible?

Setting boundaries is an important part of teaching a child discipline. Most children are orderly and love rules. This is their way of protecting themselves from the scary, incomprehensible big world. Very often parents say the word “no” out of inertia, on a subconscious level, when the child:

endangered
may harm the health of another child or adult
doing something that is inconvenient, disliked, and disturbs adults

If in the first two cases the prohibitions are justified, then in the third, parents sometimes take advantage of their superiority and overly restrict the child, which can negatively affect his development.

Read more about this in the article Children are not allowed to speak. Is it necessary to tell a child the word “no”?

You need to say “no” correctly, be sure to first analyze the essence of the prohibition. Basic principles of teaching your child the word “no”:

Act together The family must have a clear agreement that if one family member forbids something to the child, the other must support his opinion in front of the child. If there is disagreement, adults should express it privately with each other. The child must understand that if he is told “no”, then this is a rule that cannot be changed by another adult

Don’t forbid often. You should only say “you can’t” to the point, in cases where the child’s actions pose a real danger to him or others. Otherwise, if you often prohibit something in which the child shows interest, the baby will decide that everything is not allowed and will not react, even when it threatens his health.
Be consistent If a prohibition has been voiced, it cannot be changed; it should not be influenced by the child’s reaction, nor the reaction of others, nor the place, nor the time. In other words, if something is not allowed on an ordinary day, then do not make exceptions on a holiday, or if it is not allowed at home, then it is not allowed at a party, in a store, etc.
Express love The child must understand that if something is forbidden, it does not mean that they do not love
Talk to yourself Explain to your child why you can’t do this or that, and also talk to him if he doesn’t react to your words the first time, you need to talk to him the way you would like him to communicate with you. Put yourself in the baby’s shoes and choose the right words

Be Firm Try to keep your voice firm and unwavering. The baby should notice the change in voice intonation and take seriously what you say to him.
Explain It’s not enough to just say no, you must explain why you prohibit something. Otherwise, the child will think that it is impossible to do this in your presence, because... you don't like it or are angry, but will try again when left alone with yourself. It is important that the child really understands why not
Offer an alternative The prohibition will be accepted more easily if the child is offered another activity, another toy, or a promise to give him what he wants later, etc. Just be sure to keep your promises. Children remember these things better than adults. Perhaps the child will quickly switch attention and will not resist the ban, which will help avoid unnecessary conflict
Clarity of requirements Formulate your rules in a language that a child can understand, use simple words. For example: “don’t touch, it will be hot” or “you can’t, it’ll hurt mom.”

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When does a child begin to understand the word “no”?

It is difficult to say at what specific moment it is necessary to resort to restrictions and prohibitions. This time usually occurs at 9–10 months. Parents need to be prepared for the fact that the word “no” will cause violent protest among children. Nevertheless, one cannot completely abandon prohibitions and restrictions, despite strong love and the desire to please the baby. After all, in the absence of boundaries, it will be difficult for children to adapt to society.

The word “no” sounds quite unpleasant to a child. Therefore, it is advisable to resort to substitute words. Do you want to prevent your baby from touching the hot kettle? Say “hot” and show him what it feels like by leaning his handle against the warm teapot for a moment. Now he will understand the meaning of this word.

A personal example will be more indicative for the child. After all, if the parents themselves adhere to the rules that they have established, then the baby, watching them, will copy their behavior.